Roller Skate Limbo

Do you guys remember the whole “Junior High Skating Rink” scene? Remember all the games they’d try to get everyone to play? I wasn’t bad at roller skating, but I tended to steer clear of those. I just knew better…I knew my limitations. 
The one game that sticks out in my memory most is Limbo. You always knew who was going to win, after just the first round. It was ALWAYS that fucking girl who could do the splits on skates. Yeah…..and STILL, everyone wanted to give it a whirl and play. I never understood that. I mean, seriously? You think CROUCHING, which puts you an entire foot higher than split-girl, is going to win it?? You think you have a CHANCE?? No. You just had to line up and HOPE that the split-girl wasn’t there. (It never worked out that way, though. She was ALWAYS there.) 
Or how about the kids who didn’t KNOW HOW to skate!? They’d tip-tap-tip-tap-tip-tap…
 
TIP TAP TIP TAP TIP TIP TIP….
 
TIP TIP TIP TIP TIP……….TAP……………….TIP…………………………………….CLUNK!
 
They’d be moving one INCH an hour, just to eventually knock the fucking stick to the ground and be called out in the very beginning. To the parents who made their youngsters give it a whirl when they KNEW their kid couldn’t skate, nice job on lowering THAT self-esteem!
Then there were the kids who refused to believe they’d been tagged out. It’d be obvious to EVERYONE that this kid touched the damn stick….and the person working the game would tell them to get off the rink with a little point of the finger. That kid’s thinkin’ “Nah……I’m getting back in line….WHADDYA GONNA DO!!??” Because, what COULD they do? Throw the seven year old kid out on the street? Ha! At the end of the game, it’d be THAT kid, and split-girl….and it’d go for ten more fucking rounds, while everyone else just stands around wondering when it was going to end!

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