Why I Shouldn’t Play Pranks

I am in a rush to work out today.  Running later than usual to my cardio session, I still have a smile on my face.  This is not just an average grin, but one of the ornery variety.  It reflects the feelings of pure joy I have at my previous creativity! 

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Ever since Christmas-time, I have had a bottle of Elmer’s Washable Clear School Glue at my desk.  This was originally used for a fun/silly contest that involved the decorating of a Christmas tree picture.  Obviously, the “season of giving” is over, but I still have an almost-full bottle of glue!

Yesterday, I earnestly messaged Heather for a stroke of inspiration.  What should I do with it??  I wanted to use it so badly!! 

I thought to myself, “There must be SOME fun thing I could do with this, something that needs mending or decorated!!”

No clear thought came to me until today.

Even though I was busy all day, I was able to find a few minutes this morning to boost my office morale and USE MY AWESOME, CLEAR GLUE!!  The plan was masterful, yet subtle.  I could tell you what I did here, but on the off chance that the victim reads my blog, I shall leave it out.  I only hope that my little prank isn’t so subtle that it doesn’t get noticed for a week—this is possible. 

But, I can wait….oh yes….I am patient.

But I digress!  Back to the locker room–where I’m quickly changing into my workout garb and hoping that the next round of exercises won’t be in full swing until I emerge.

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I’m dressed.

I grab a pony-tail holder and begin to sweep my hair up and out of my face.

THIS is when I realize that my simple little prank somehow went awry.  There, just above my ear, I feel it.

Something as hard as rock…something……………….. stuck in my hair!

An expression of utter puzzlement crosses my face, and then the epiphany slams into me like a ton of bricks!!

I HAVE GLUE IN MY HAIR!!!

At the very moment this realization hits, a pounding begins…

It’s not my head…

It’s not my imagination….

It’s the fitness trainer!! 

Cory’s knocking on the door to let me know that “HEY…..WE WERE GOING TO WAIT FOR YOU, BUT YOU’RE OBVIOUSLY TAKING AN HOUR IN THERE TO CHANGE!”  (At least, that’s what I imagine is going through his head….)

But everyone who is out there waiting on me–they just DON’T KNOW!!

I have a horrible “Something About Mary” type of situation, and the only way to remedy it might be too awful to imagine!!!

I begin to panic, clawing at the clump, to no avail!  I pull out my brush and swipe, SWIPE, SWIPE at the glued hair!!  It finally begins to come loose, and I start picking at it again, like some desperate sort of caged animal who is close to escape!!

It won’t all come out….it’s somehow managed to BOND ITSELF to my hair!  The glue has completely engulfed my DNA, mated with my hair follicle, and it is a part of me!!  There’s only ONE WAY TO BE RID OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**YANK**

**TEAR**

**SCRAPE, SCRAPE**

**RIIIIIIIIIIP**

It is done. 

A triumphant smile returns to my face as I waltz into the fitness room.

This is why I shouldn’t play pranks.

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